One of the hairiest, oddest faces to emerge from the West Coast in recent years, Joe Cutter has elbowed his way into the battle rap community’s awareness with a wonderfully weird battle against Tiger Ty and a killer Ground Zero clash against Reverse Live. Adam “Mos Prob” Felman caught up with him - not to find out anything about him, but just to see what he would answer.
Mos Prob: What’s your favourite fabric?
Cutter: Vinyl, because that’s super hip hop of me. And whatever Shuffle T’s coat is made out of.
MP: Which five battlers would you say could plausibly have hatched from an egg?
Cutter: Dirtbag Dan vs Rone, Diz vs Caustic, Pariah vs Fredo because Pariah has a massive egg for a head, Jack Shitt vs Dirt and Jae 90 vs Villun.
MP: I think that’s ten, and I don’t really understand the meanings behind my question or your answer, but we’ll run with it. Have you ever worn a cape in an inappropriate place? Where and why?
Cutter: One of the times I opened up for Kool Keith, I wore a cape to commemorate his Sex Style album cover.
MP: What do you feel is the weirdest thing you ever said in a battle?
Cutter: In my battle with Denter I said: “You probably never get puss judged by the way that you’re talking, you’d probably drag your dick through a thousand miles of glass and tar just to hear a fat bitch fart through a Walkie-Talkie.”
MP: Which obscure country would you like to start a battle league in and why?
Cutter: South Africa because I love Yolandi from Die Antwoord and I have a soft spot for amputees.
MP: What was it like being socially outcast at age three for being the only kindergarten kid with arm hair?
Cutter: Having hairy arms from kindergarten was actually beneficial cuz it created a good segue for me to lose my virginity at the age of seven.
MP: Have you ever had a prostate check with a lightsaber, as you mention in one of your songs? What was it like?
Cutter: No, I have never had a prostate check with a lightsaber. But being the self-proclaimed most unhealthy battle rapper in the game I probably should, seeing as I’m not exactly a spring chicken anymore.
MP: How many people do you think you’re cooler than? Roughly?
Cutter: I’ll be a monkey’s uncle if I’m not at least cooler than 63 per cent of the battle scene.
MP: Do you support the San Jose Sharks and why?
Cutter: In my entire existence I’ve attended one Sharks game. That’s probably all they’re going to get from me. They can feel free to get mental support on a infinite level cuz Joe Thornton puts hands on ‘em.
MP: Describe San Jose in five and a half words.
Cutter: This city is really fucking cray.
MP: Where does the name “Four-oh-hate’ come from? You say it a lot.
Cutter: 408 is San Jose’s area code, and hate is something we get a lot of as a result of being awesome.
MP: You love representing 408. Have you ever noticed that 4, 0 and 8 add up to twelve? Would it not be easier just to represent twelve?
Cutter: My head just exploded from the irony of this being the twelfth question. I will strongly consider repping 12 as of now.
MP: What do you think of the number twelve?
Cutter: I think it should come after the number 13 instead of before.
MP: How about the number twelve?
Cutter: Now that I think about it it’s kind of a scary number because of the gang MS 13. Shouts to my El Salvadorians.
MP: Would you rather eat chocolate-flavoured poo or poo-flavoured chocolate?
Cutter: Poo-flavoured chocolate of course. The name implies that it’s not real poo.
MP: But it tastes like … you know what, never mind. What’s your favourite jelly bean?
Cutter: It’s a toss-up between enchilada and popcorn.
MP: You call yourself Cutter S. Thompson a lot. What’s your favourite Hunter S. Thompson book?
Cutter: Hell’s Angels.
MP: Give me three rhymes you’d say to yourself in a mirror match.
Cutter: I’d say:
“I’m surprised you don’t have more massive flaring pecs,
Cause you beat yourself violently in the chest during sex,
oh what you wanna fight asshole?! after I do this, whiplash.
Ima headbutt the both of us through two inches of glass.”
MP: Should we tell everyone about the collab EP we’re going to drop this year?
Cutter: Most definitely. And also make it a point to convey the fact that it’s going to be tighter than everything spewed from our subculture.
MP: Yeah, so that’s happening. Thanks Uncle Joe.
Check out Joe Cutter vs Reverse Live in February’s Battles to Watch
Or, for something completely different, look at some battle rap statistics.